Calvin’s Healing Journey

In 2019, I found myself in the darkest emotional cloud I had ever experienced in my entire life. A year and a half previous, I made the decision to leave the FLDS religion that I had lived in all of my 30 years. While I would never go back on choosing a life more authentic to who I really am, I couldn’t have anticipated how incredibly difficult it would be to transition into this new way of life. My mental health deteriorated. I found myself sad, confused, and lonely. I was almost to the point where I doubted if this was all worth carrying on.


I reached out to the Suicide Prevention Hotline. That decision to reach out and ask for help proved to be the most important decision of that year. They put me in touch with Holding Out Help. I had no idea there was a team of people dedicated to helping others through such a big life transition! For the first time, I no longer felt alone. Holding Out Help not only understood my situation, but they were so willing to help in any and every way that they could — including getting me professional help from therapists and counselors.


Two years later, I’m in a much better space, primarily because of my mental health. Not every day is sunshine and rainbows, and I know now that that’s okay. I’m happier and my outlook on life is bright. It’s been an amazing journey finding “me.” Having Holding Out Help in my corner has given me the foundation I needed through my life’s biggest transition. 


Thanks so much to everyone at Holding Out Help! I’ll be forever grateful. And if someone reading this is ever feeling like the load is getting much too heavy to bear, please do the brave thing — reach out and ask for help. 


— Calvin